Excrement – A to Z Challenge

E is for excrement on the path of life (okay, just on the path)

I was out enjoying the spring weather my area of the planet is experiencing, with a nice walk around the lake. My pallid skin practically leapt off my bones to soak up some much-needed sun; my bed head rooster tail swayed with the gentle wind. “Good morning” and “great weather” echoed from passerbys. It was glorious!

Until . . .

A massive, steaming pile of dog shit (I least I hope it was, but you never know nowadays) appeared in the middle of the path. I was lucky to avoid it, but some poor bugger was not. One side of the pile was crushed with a clear imprint of a running shoe and a trail of shit crumbs leading away from the scene. I imagined the dog looking up at his owner, “Okay, I’m done here. It’s a big one, maybe a two-hander. Let’s get this cleaned-up. There’s a cute retriever heading this way.”  As the owner tugged the leash and walked away, I imagined the dog, panicking. “Okay, I’m not cool with leaving a pile of my crap right here. I’m willing to eat it.”

I watched as passerbys shook their heads in disbelief at the offending mound, avoiding it like it was a giant pile of excrement. Even dogs trotting along the path with their owners turned their noses away in disgust and seemed to say, “How filthy. Any self-respecting dog knows to pinch a stool on the grass.”

e-excrementArtist’s Rendition

I’m not climbing on a self-righteous box, here. I’m not perfect. I’ve done arsehole-ish things like litter and throw away stuff that could be recycled. And if I’m being really honest with you dear reader, there have been times that I was unable to scoop up my own dog’s doodoo because I had run out of poop bags. But. In my defense, there is a fundamental difference between a massive steaming pile of dog shit in the middle of a path and one final must empty-the-pipes-dribble on a patch of dirt at the end of a walk.

Nonetheless, it seems to me that letting your dog drop a massive load on a path/sidewalk without picking it up is tantamount saying “I don’t give a ‘shit’ about anyone else.”But that might be just me.


5 thoughts on “Excrement – A to Z Challenge

  1. Steven Chapman says:

    I hate it when people do this because people tar all us dog owners with the same brush!

    Or even worse, when they pick it up with a bag then tie it to a tree like some sicko’s idea of a perfect Christmas tree decoration. Grrrr….

  2. Rhonda Parrish says:

    I totally agree. I freaking hate it when people don’t bother to pick up after their dogs. Drives me up the walls. Rawr!

  3. Wayne says:

    Sounds like you have a Great Dane on this path!…always watch your step on these dog walks because it only takes one irresponsible human to ruin your stroll.

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